


Just Friends

by The_Hawk_Eye



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, F/M, M/M, POV Harry Potter, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-09
Updated: 2018-10-09
Packaged: 2019-07-23 19:39:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 891
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16165610
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Hawk_Eye/pseuds/The_Hawk_Eye
Summary: We would be friends forever.Any time I think about us, I can only remember the good times; when we laughed together; when we were planning our adventures together.





	Just Friends

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Friends](https://archiveofourown.org/works/16165706) by [The_Hawk_Eye](https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Hawk_Eye/pseuds/The_Hawk_Eye). 



> I wrote this years ago... after the last book was published. And the other day I saw it on my computer and well why wouldn't I publish this? My sister gave me the idea although this wasn't her intention at all. She is disappointed at me because of the result... Sorry!
> 
> English is not my first language so sorry for the mistakes!

I always thought love, true love, could only end well for the lovers; that at the end they would end together. For a boy who's all his childhood has been abused and marginalized by his family because he was a bad child who did everything wrong and who should be alone, it was really important to believe that one day that would change.

For being always alone in my room, I started believing in fairy tales.

When the owl came; when Hagrid appeared and I found Hogwarts; the tale I told myself all my life suddenly turned into something real. I believed I could have everything I dreamt about.

Then you came; my first and only friend at the moment. You approached me without hesitation and you helped me to discover a new world. We shared our food (although none of us ate your sandwiches); we laughed together and joked about everything. We even shared our fears about the future.

And in a few minutes, I knew I would never let you go.

We would be friends forever.

Any time I think about us, I can only remember the good times; when we laughed together; when we were planning our adventures together. I only can remember the moments when we were happy.

And only when I stop to remember carefully what has been our friendship, I think about all those other moments when we fought. The worst fight we ever had was the one in the fourth year, during the tournament. Neither of us could understand the other. And I especially refused to realize why you felt that way. Now I am aware of how stupid I was.

It comes to my mind as well when you disappeared in the middle of the night in that forest while we were hunting the rest of the Horcruxes. I waited every night after that one for you to come back to us so you could fix everything because without you the golden trio was broken. And you came back when I needed you the most. That night I could see all the pain you were hiding behind a smile and all the fears that haunted you when you only wanted to be happy.  I saw you facing all your nightmares and defeating them.

It is a secret between us. I know it sounds childish and even selfish but I’m glad I’m the only one who knows what happened that night. I’m the only one who knows what you’re capable of. I’m the only one who saw you overcoming all your anxieties.

I’m glad because it is a secret between us.

Because that memory it’s the only thing that belongs to us.

Because you will never be mine.

Because you will never share with me what you have with her.

That’s the reason why I hold onto that memory, that secret. It is a promise of silence which never will be broken and that creates an ‘us’.

Because a long time ago you decided that your happiness was in her arms and not in mine.

Because we will always be friends.

And it doesn’t matter what I wish. It doesn’t matter that I long for everything you give to her with a smile.

Because we will be only friends.

And it doesn’t matter that sometimes I want to scream my feelings for you.

It doesn’t matter how much it hurts me to see you holding her hand.

You have taught me all that matter in life. And before you went to her arms, you taught me that love, true love, is not a fairy tale. I learnt with you that sometimes the silence is the only option because I can lose everything I love if I decide to say out loud how I feel about you.

I learnt that sometimes true love is about loving the other person from the distance.

You have created your own fairy tale and I’m just a supporting character and she is co-protagonist; leaving empty the space I always saved for you in my story.

But not everything is bad.

I’m still by your side; I’m still important in your life. And thanks to your sister I can see your bright smile often; the smile I wish you would dedicate to me but that belongs to her.

There are moments, when I’m in the dark of my room, that I can see you lying down by my side. And those are the happiest moments for me when I’m not with you; when I touch you freckled and white skin, or when I caress your red hair... because she looks like you.

I play a sick game with her.

Because when I look at her eyes and I don’t find your blue iris but her brown’s I realize that my dreams will never come true. And I hug her because she keeps alive my delusions. She makes me see the reality but at the same time she feeds my false hopes

And that’s like a dream for me.

Because it’s the only thing I can aspire to.

Because in no other way I could be so close to you.

Because you are happy.

Because I don’t think I can be happier in another way if not yearning for you

Because we will always be friends.

And nothing else.

Just friends.

**Author's Note:**

> Well, I hope you liked it! I'm sorry for everything because this is a disgrace and I know it.
> 
> Kudos and comment will make me really happy :)
> 
> Link to my tumblr as a writer: [Tumblr](https://the-hawk-eye-fics.tumblr.com/)


End file.
